To Perceive is to Filterpret

I read this article from Jonathan Liu at Wired on Friday. Effectively, Census says if you are not the Mother, you cannot be the full-time caregiver. Jonathan, being a stay at home Dad, took issue with this and spoke quite eloquently on topic in his article. His experience with gender bias from the US Government made me think of my similar experience.

A National Children’s Study research analyst from SLU stopped by our home several times this summer. Every single time she came calling, she would only want to speak with my wife. During her third visit, I became slightly indignant that she couldn’t (or wouldn’t) tell me the exact nature of the questions or just ask me the questions. I inquired repeatedly why the Father could not participate, it being a study on children and families. The only reason I was provided concerned the fact that Mothers needed to answer questions regarding their nutritional status during pregnancy.

This answer did not sit right with me and I still wondered why a Father couldn’t answer the other non-pregnancy questions. Fast forward a week and I actually went to the Study website, which clearly says that Mothers are supposed to be the participants:

“Women interested in finding out if they are eligible to join the National Children’s Study should contact the appropriate local Study location,” and “Women and their families could have a major impact on the health of future generations by joining the National Children’s Study, helping their communities and country to gain a better understanding of children’s health and development,” and “Current plans include enrollment of 100,000 women and their children into the Study.”

As you can see family participation is mentioned, in fact it is highlighted throughout the website. Interestingly, I could not find a single mention of Dads or Fathers on the website. In addition, while Mothers are obviously to be the key participants in the study, it never actually says why. This struck me as especially strange given this next piece of information listed in several locations on the website:

“The National Children’s Study will be conducted in 105 locations (counties or groups of counties) across the United States. All locations were selected using a scientifically based method to ensure that children and families across the nation—from diverse ethnic, racial, economic, religious, geographic, and social groups—are included.”

Notice gender is not listed. This made me think, are single Father’s not allowed to participate in the study? Are single sex couples not allowed to participate? These questions were significantly troubling in light of the stated goal of the Study:

“The National Children’s Study is a unique opportunity to be a part of a nationwide landmark health effort. It will be one of the most comprehensive research efforts, and the largest and most detailed study in history focused on children’s health and development in the Unites States. The Study will examine the effects of the environment, as broadly defined to include factors such as air, water, diet, sound, family dynamics, community and cultural influences, and genetics on the growth, development, and health of children across the United States, following them from before birth until age 21 years.” 

I was firmly vexed at this point. I, like Jonathan Liu, called to further explore why Fathers and same-sex couples seem to be of no interest to the NIH. After being bounced around for a while, I finally reached a female support staff member and immediately explained to her my quandary. Unfortunately, I was not thinking about recording our conversation for posterity, so I failed to write down the exact extent of our exchange. I can pass on the basic idea that was provided to me that fine summer afternoon.

Effectively I was told because the study is tracking health issues from conception until the age of 21, it is vital to speak with the Mother from the beginning. I conceded the importance to the study of determining the health status of the Mother during pregnancy. However, I pointed out, beyond birth that left my questions unanswered. I was then told to maintain simplicity, efficiency, and uniformity the same person should be the contact for the Study throughout.

When I pressed her, she would not say that same-sex couples or single Father’s were being excluded from this study, she also would not say they were being included. I expected little in the way of acknowledgment when I began the call and my lack of optimism was duly rewarded. Reading Jonathan Liu’s post, it brought back to me the feeling of outrage I had that day. For bureaucrats in our government to say that only a woman, a Mother, matters in a study about children is out of touch with reality.

21 years + 9 months, lets say 22 years.  Over 22 years it is necessary to speak with the Mothers for questions related to less than 5% of the overall time! Outside of that 5%, ANY caring, loving, and attentive parent should be able to answer questions regarding the other 21 years.

It is sad to imagine a study of the magnitude the NIH is performing is beginning with 50-year-old gender and family roles. Life is an ever-changing and complex wonder, too bad our government isn’t.